If I could pretend that I'm asleep,
When my tears start to fall
I peek out from behind these walls..
I think nobody knows..

Thursday, August 18, 2011


dah masuk 4 bulan aku tak kerja. tido pon tak lena. malam-malam sure aku terkenang nasib aku. banyak interview aku dah pegi. semuanya aku buat tapi still belom rezeki aku lagi.


bila aku nak dapat kerja?

Sunday, August 14, 2011

iftar dengan budak2 unisel RP

hari sabtu lepas aku berbuka puasa dengan budak2 RP unisel ( RP - RUMAH PANJANG) hahhaha aku menyebok lah sebab lama tak jumpa kawan-kawan unisel. haa yang bestnyer bila dah lepas 3 tahun ada yang dah kerja macam-macam tempat, ada yang belajar lagi buat degree ada yang berniaga rojak (tuh tak sure confirm dia. so lokasi berbuka hari tuh dekat taman kemuning flaming steamboat buffet. bayar RM20 tapi dorang yang over makan sampai membazir. si kuda lah makan banyak2 sampai tak terhabis membazir jerk. si sopie sebok plak kacau si ganu mentang-mentang ganu tuh comel lote. hahahah.

ni gara-gara sebok nak bergambar habis rambut aku meleket dengan marshmallow si sopie yang dicampur ice cream dan cokelat cair. sebab over excited marshmallow kat mulot dia kene rambut aku! memang over lah kau sopie.

sopie tak habis-habis usik ganu kesian ganu kene buli hari tuh.

si kudA memanglah suka sangat ambik makanan banyak-banyak lepas tuh tak habis. penat aku bising-bising.

malam tuh aku balik dekat pukul 11 lebih tapi diorang lepak-lepak lagi tak puas lah melepak kejap jerk. hope lepas ni boleh lepak lama-lama.

Saturday, August 6, 2011


for the first time in my life i feel so awkward shopping but i have no money in my pocket. Almost 4months i'm not working and most of my expenses my bf support me. At the same time i just realized that nowadays difficult for me to get job even though i got more than two years working experiences.

Now i'm sms with razif my ex-boss at biotechcorp. heard from one of my ex colleagues that now razif had been transferred to other department and if i'm not mistaken he now is under Corporate department and no longer with CSSD. well I've learn lot of things from him when we worked together as a team in CSSD. He said that he really miss his kids and now they stay in Vancouver, Canada. He said again that he just live here alone and sometimes he stay with his parents.

Just thinking, razif have a good career, good education and he have a good life but sometimes he feel so lonely because he was too busy commitment with his work. I know its ain't easy working as SVP for a big company cos he gives most of his life to achieve a good career development. I just pity with him and that's why now we still close even though we not working together. Well i never forget him because he is the boss that i ever had. Despite i jump to other companies. I never fail to say Hi to him. It's the way i show my concern towards him.

Gina khan now so happy with her new job as Tutor for forensic. lucky her :) I just sitting at my place and thinking what will be happen to me after this. is it i'm still searching for a good life or i still the same?

Friday, August 5, 2011


if you read the title of course you will be confused and keep asking what the meaning of my title. what i mean by Second? Here we go, what i mean by second it because i attended for the second interview with exxon mobil but this interview with different position that i has been applied before. The position that i was interview is Admin Exec for Drilling department. The interviewer is Mr. Nathan and he so friendly with me. What i feel during the interview session are i'm not nervous but i have the weird feeling which is that i'm very confident with myself and answering all the question without failed. The interview session takes more than one hour and half. Lots of thing he has explained to me and the most important i try my best level to improve my interpersonal skill.

After i done the interview, i suddenly feels so nervous and afraid is it i talked too much or i didn't gives a good explanation during the interview session. all of things was insult my mind until now. I non stop thinking and what i afraid if i didn't get any job again. I feel so tired because since the past three months lot of interviews i was attends but until now i still jobless.

Life so hard because what i wanted and dreaming not at all i can get. Yem always told me that one day i will get a good career. He never fail to advise me and always gives me a good support. Yem thanks for your advice and until now i still learn to improve myself.

If i get the second chance and i get a better job i want to prove to yem that one day i will be a successful women and i want he proud with me. Yem please pray for me.
Now i take a deep breathe and i know i have a long journey that i have to face.