k a m i

hari ni kami semua gembira, sebab semua orang sedang berbicara tapi hanya kata dan riak muka yang benar-benar faham apa yang sedang kami katakan..
hari ni kami semua senyum, dan kami melihat kesetiap riak manusia disekeliling.

tuhan terima kasih untuk hari ni, sebab senyum itu indah..

love letter

dear love,

t a w f i k h a f i z i b r a h i m

I guess the reason I'm writing this is because I'm missing you.
And the one person I remembered the most is you.
Do you remember me as I remember you?
you were special, and you still are.

Fixing A Broken Heart

Indecent Obsession » Fixing A Broken Heart

There was nothing to say the day she left
Just filled a suitcase full of regrets
I hailed a taxi in rain
Looking for some place to ease the pain, ooh
Then like an answered prayer
I turned you around and found you there

* You really know where to start
Fixing a broken heart
You really know what to do
Your emotional tools can cure any fool
Whose draems have broken apart
Fixing a broken heart

Now I don't understand what I'm going through
There must be a plan that led me to you
Because the hurt just disappears
In every moment that you are neat, yeah
Just like an answered prayer
You must the londliness easy to bear

* repeat

Soon the rain will stop falling baby
And I'll forget the past
'cause here we are at leat

* repeat

m a L a m

Hari ni aku pecah-pecahkan kata-kata sang hujan,

dan aku deraikannya diatas tanah,

rintik yang sedang membasahi daun belum tentu akan menyegarkannya.

tengahari..

aku sedang melakar awan,

yang aku sibuk menconteng tapi aku alpa pada bentuknya.

Mungkin aku biaskan cahaya, tapi aku tidak mewarnakannya.

Kali ini aku belajar untuk berjalan, tanpa sebarang tongkatan,

kemudian aku berlari sehingga aku penat dan aku akhirnya berhenti.

sedang aku sibuk mengejar tentang kesamaran waktu.

Aku mula mendongak melihat muka malam.

mencari seungkai kata untuk dirasa.

yang aku gubah-gubah tapi tiada bunyinya..

jika tak rapat sekali pun awan,

aku akan hilang...

speechless

Yesterday..

Tressie sms me and she tell me a good news.
Guess what? I got the job.

I'm happy but at the same time I feel sad because I have to leave all my friends and my memory with Biotechcorp. Nikgee cannot accept my decision. The truth is Biotechcorp does not appreciate my work, eventhough I try so many times to be a good worker.

Its hard for me to leave Razif, He taught me many things, and one of the most important lessons I've ever learnt.
Next week is my last week with Biotechcorp..
I couldn't cry maybe this is the best for my life and my new journey with Tressie Yap Architect firm.

I have so many things to say but just for today I am speechless somehow,is such word existed in my dictionary.



This is a journey of many first- some good, some bad, and I am constantly reminded that some journeys are meant to be journeyed alone, and some paths are best walked with another.

I am forced to reevaluate myself, and what I want - and the journey has been one that has opened my eyes to a lot of things.

should I say Good Bye now?

second

It's like one morning I wake up and realize, whose left I'm living in?

Cause it can't possibly be mine.

I wonder, what's t like to walk with the air of dignity self-love you walk around with.

Being amnesiac me,even just for a fraction of second, even just in my imagination.

I don’t ever tell anybody anything.

If I do, I start missing everybody...

akuPunBerjalan?

Hari ni hari Ahad aku pun berjalan ikot mama membeli barang2 ijan yang nak kahwen - kenapa bahasa melayu aku tongang langang? takpe ni terpengaruh Tawfik tak reti cakap Melayu cos I sound silly when I speak in Malay..erkkk



Location; gIant-Carefour-Jusco
Time;10am-16.30pm
The hot followers; Nina sakura ,Ijan ,Ika, Mama & fara
Topic;akupunberjalan?



sampai je kat kedai yang jual alat2 kahwen ni, aku dengan nina psycho dengan barang2 sana,ijan yang nak kawen aku dengan nina sibuk pergi carik barang, biasalah anak Pak Sali memang bising habis satu kedai kiterorang buat macam kedai Sali&Co,NOT Tiffany&Co yee. Seetelah jiwa kami serabut maka terhasillah aksi tak sepatutnya-sambil memikir apa yang tak cukup.

Sampai je kat Carefour duit pon sepah-sepah terbang,mula-mula nina lah gedik nak ice cream lah. Pastuh mama kata nak gi jusco aku dahlah patah kaki tangan penat berjalan mak aku ni pantang kalau dapat berjalan, dia lagi hebat dari aku..akupunberjalan lagi..

ketika dalam kereta-aku telah rasa sangatlah teruja secara tetibe kereta kesukaan aku volkswagen betul2 weh depan kereta aku..apa lagi ambil hp nina macam orang gila aku snap picture kereta tuh - *kereta idaman ni*.


time ni aku suh nina pergi kejar kereta ni dengan melanggar lampu isyarat..ada kami kisah?


masa ni traffic light merah aku bulun snap lagi-gile dow aku masa ni, mama kat belakang dah bising2..aku dengan nina buat muka *kami tak bersalah mama*..


yeah,berkat aku doa nak snap gambar dekat-dekat termakbul jua.aku cakap dengan mama, mama kalau nak suh aku ambil driving license kene belikan aku volkswagen kaler silver macam kereta ni barulah aku ambik lesen kereta..

Sampai jer di Jusco.


aku pantang nampak benda pelik2 semua aku snap termasuklah cadar katak kepam dan berbentuk pisang..nina sangatlah teruja dengan penyangkut mug yang berharga 10 hinggit tuh.keterujaan si nina terselah bersama aku.Maka nina membuat decision untuk membeli penyangkut tersebut..



Nina yang dalam excited sebelum membeli penyangkut mug..
ucapan beliau ditengah2 jusco-terima kasih kepada mak dan ayah yang menyokong saya.
aku pon pelik?apa kene mengena penyangkut mug dengan ucapan kau yang takder kene mengena langsung..motif???

kami pun berjalan lagi.. aku kata weh aku haus mari kita pergi minum..


tiba-tiba aku teringat kecik2 aku suka isap cuut cuut..ni lah cuut-cuut yang aku suka ketuk kat kepala hazel bila kecik2 aku nak milo lepas balik tadika.

++++dah habis dah++++

garcinia cambogia & phyllanthus amarus

Today is my second day doing Ctag committee technical papers. I admit for the first time I can't do this paper cos of I have no experience regarding research for molecule structure-hydroxycitric acid on Garcinia cambogia herb.


Molecule structure for Garcinia cambogia- The extract of hydroxycitric acid (HCA) from Garnia cambogia fruit claimed to suppress appetite and enhance fat-burning.

See, This is first time I heard about Garcinia cambogia herb and then I learn and make a little bit research about Phyllanthus amarus -scientific name for phyllantannthaceac.


Molecule structure for Phyllanthus amarus herb.

Phyllanthus amarus primarily contains lignans and is mainly used in the treatment of gout uric acid as it possesses anti hyperuricemic properties and is potentially suitable to improve gout and related disorders.

I am too tired until i lost my voice today and it happened suddenly to me. I am starting to worry if i cant finish all the papers before today ends. but now I am confused about lepidium meyenii herb.

xoxo- still make a research...meh?

imperfections

There is a part of me, which I'm not ready to part with just yet.
It takes no brainer to figure out which part exactly.

If only I could hide everything like I hid my imperfections behind my hair.

Some people annoy me without even having to blink - let alone speak.



I curious,
How does it feel?
Is it possible that my life now is both difficult and beautiful at the same time?

It does not to do dwell on dreams, and forget to live.

One day my pain will become my cure.

I have so many things to say but I have no time..

mERah itu r.e.d

aku risau kat ajie hari ni dah 2hari dia mc tak datang keje..aku concern pasal ajie. dan tiba-tiba sedang aku sibuk-sibuk nak berblog musuh ketatku aka hilmi from HR pulak muncul..heiiiii apa kau buat disini,buat muka poyo lagi..selamat si liza datang jumpa aku bagi chocolate..ekekeke..i love chocolate..tenang sikit aku,aku asyik emo jer minggu ni,kan?ada aku kisah..ekekeke..aku tak tahulah kenapa aku suka chocolate sekarang..biarlah orang kata makan chocolate boleh gemok,aku janji happy dapat makan chcocolate adess teringat chocolate beryls almond aku,sedaplah dah lama aku tak makan chocolate tuh.

nikgee pulak sibuk kata aku dah gemok,eleh nik kau jeles sebab tak dapat sedot lemak2 aku yang comelkan? aku agak jer nik.

semalam tawfik bagi tahu aku June ni mungkin dia tak dapat balik,aisehmen kesian plak tengok dia.susah sangat ke assignment dia?perlukah aku meminta pertolongan jeinab aka zainal aroha zainal arshad,aku tahu jeinab memang sangat power bab-bab ni cos dulu dia pernah kerja dengan facebook overseas. jeinab ni aku suka style dia.pergi shopping masuk kedai mahal-mahal pon dia tetap dengan style selamber dewa dia *tshirt bodoh+selipar jepon+short pants+rambut alfro dia pastuh dengan spec dia macam kaler.

tadi waktu aku pergi kerja adalah seorang mamat ni dia selalu hantar awek dia pergi kerja and then park dekat depan citibank..vespa dia cun kaler purple.fuyoooh aku teruja giler, dan aku mulalah start berangan tadi....

"kalaulah aku ada vespa tak pon minicooper kaler merah-merah kaler feveret sedunia., pasti aku kelihatan hebat dan jebat membawa kenderaan tersebut,bayangkan bawak minicooper pastuh aku pakai short pants,tshirt aku bertajuk " bapak aku kata mak kau rongeng" dan tambahan lagi dengan kasut converse merah..weh aku bengang betol teringat kasut aku kaler merah hilang last year, tahu tak sali belikan kasut tuh untuk aku pergi class.aku merindui kasut merah tuh sumpah aku nak suh sali belikan baru sebab tak sama dengan beli sendiri.



dalam hati asyik tanya lebih dari sejuta kali bilelah dapat nak beli kete minicooper merah ni..impian tuh kene tulis dan tampal kat depan pc opis,sebelum umur 30 tahun saya nak memiliki sebuah kereta minicooper kaler merah.

motif, hazel kenapa aku bau blackberry bold 9700? sajerkah mahu buat aku jealous?

yang terindah

sedang aku sibuk di office, aku hampir lupa kejutkan hadiah terindah tuhan untuk ku "Tawfik". seperti biasa, setiap hari aku akan call tawfik untuk dia bangun pagi,walaupon mahal call Aussie,tapi aku tak kesah sebab aku sentiasa menghargai dia.
yang aku harap aku sentiasa ada untuknya.

sejak akhir ini, aku kerap lihat aggiee aku tidak seceria dahulu,mungkin kerana dia bosan dengan hidupnya disana. Tawfik aku pun bosan tanpa kau tawfik,cepatkan tawfik masa berlalu? ketika aku sedang tutup mata dan celik kembali sudah 47hari 12jam 20 minit dan 16saat kau pergi tinggalkan aku.

tapi aku tekadkan diri yang kau pasti akan pulang.dan aku sentiasa menghitung saat kau ada didepan mata aku, dan senyumanmu membuat aku menarik nafas lega.
tawfik tahu tak waktu pertama kali aku jumpa kau dekat rumah nazrin? time tuh kau tak habis-habis senyum sampai aku asyik melihat kearah kau yang sedang bersorak gembira. aku masih ingat lagi dengan kau jugaklah for the 1st time I celebrate Valentine's day dekat restoran atas bukit. Time tuh kau pakai kemeja kaler purple.

setiap kenangan yang kau bagi tawfik tak pernah aku lupa pun,semua aku ingat termasuklah bila kau selalu curik2 buat mulot comel.tawfik, kalaulah aku ada disana disisi kau, aku pasti akan buat kau manusia yang paling bahagia.
aku akan berdiri dibelakang kau dan bangunkan kau saat kau sedang jatuh.
tawfik walaupon kau suka kata kau tak hensem dan gemok, tapi bagi aku, kaulah manusia yang paling sempurna tuhan ciptakan untuk aku.

tawfik janji ya kau akan selalu happy dengan life kau.
sebab kau manusia yang perlu ada dalam hidup aku.
tawfik yang terindah untuk aku.yang aku rasa aku perlukan dia untuk meneruskan hidup aku.
ya, aku bahagia jika tawfik bahagia. aku sayangkan aggiee, tuhan..
Tuhan, lindungilah tawfik dari segala bencana,
permudahkanlah hidupnya,
bahagiakanlah dia kerna aku sangat mencintai dirinya tuhan..
amin..

hujan jangan menangis

Ketika aku sedang tertawa,

kau bicara tentang cinta,

bila aku masih lagi di awangan,

kau ungkapkan kata kenyataan,

yang mungkin bagiku tak sejalan..

tentang cerita,

yang kau kata itu ialah aku,

pelabuhan kebahagian yang belum pernah dikejar kau.

yang di rasa-terindah?

hadir tiada keresahan,

hujan jangan menangis,

walaupun kenyataan tak sejalan..

senyum mengiring detik aku kejatuhan..

tapi aku selalu ada untuk dia..

bababababa

sejuknya hari ni,aku ambil masa 5minit untuk berjemur dibawah matahari..sangatlah sejuk..kerja pulak takder kat office,mata aku asyik mengantok jer.
minggu ni aku mengaku sangatlah penat dan mengantok,aku makan tak sangat tapi aku sangatlah nak tido,mungkin ini berlaku disebabkan aku dah 3 hari tak makan ciku.sebab ciku bagi aku adalah sumber inspirasi aku ketika bekerja.

tadi pon time lunch aku tertido sekejap sambil aku sebok-sebok chat dgn tawfik,mata aku memang tak boleh control dari nak tido..maaf aku mengaku aku tido mati sekarang.
sampaikan orang call aku pon aku tak dengar. Aku penat sangat-sangat..aku just nak rehat jer.

esok dah jumaat, kene pergi Gim lagi, pastuh kejap lagi nak teman ajie beli barang2 untuk lawan bowling nanti,ahad insyallah kalau jadi nak pergi hiking.mak ai..baru perasan dari last week aku busy sampaikan takder masa untuk aku rehat.

kan best kalau sekarang ni aku ada kat atas katil,sambil tutup muka dgn bantal busuk aku dan pelok bear-bear aku kuat..
ohhh bantal.. =(

sedang

petang yang damai, aku sedang melihat awan yang sedang bersorak keatas langit sambil menutupi selimut putihnya. Aku hanya menjenguk ke luar tingkap, yang biasa aku bicara pada awan tentang hidup. Hari ni aku berdiri, sambil mengetip bibir aku, mungkin kata-kata aku sedang maki dan marah tapi hati aku tidak. Hari ni tiada lagi kacauan dan aku hanya sunyi sesaat tapi kegelapan langit mendakap aku penuh erat.
Mungkin kau hanya boleh berkata menggunakan akal tetapi kau alpa tentang hati yang masih merah dan masih berdenyut. ketika kau sedang seronok dan pentingkan kata nafsu hati, aku hanya senyap dan kaku,ketika kau sorak dan gembira bersama yang lain,adakah kau ingat tentang kewujudan manusia yang bernama aku?
sedang kau asyik tentang diri kau, adakah kau sedetik terdengar suara ngiangku?ketika kau mengorak langkah kehadapan,sedar tak kau bahwa aku sentiasa dibelakang kau?kerna aku gentar kau akan jatuh tapi tiada pautan.
sedang aku yang asyik dan sentiasa lena fikirkan semua tentang kau.
adakah kau ada waktu sesaat kau lafazkan kata-kata kau menghargai aku?
kau seperti bintang yang susah aku gapai tapi kau akhirnya gagal sebagai seorang yang ada perasaan. tahu tak kau yang aku bukan bayang-bayang?tapi aku adalah sesuatu yang wujud yang boleh kau sentuh hatinya.tapi engkau tidak...

seputung masa

lagu: Hujan-aku scandal

Aku sedang berlari-lari mengapai waktu mengejar erti masa, disebabkan mimpi buruk semalam tidak akan berulang dihari-hari yang lain. Aku membuat lonjakan paradigma, dengan menyarung heel sempat lagi berlari-lari untuk touch card..adoii,selamat Razif takder pergi Chicago, kalau tak mesti aku kene mengadap muka Razif dan beri sebab kenapa aku lambat..Huh? aku sedang mengeluh..

Tiba-tiba jer suara aku serak macam Amy search pagi ni, masalahnya aku asyik batok-batok jer. Minggu ni adalah Bowling tournament,harap2 aku berjaya lah yer..ekekeke..

semalam memang mimpi buruk, aku harap janganlah lagi mimipi buruk aku datang lagi..
aku nak mulakan life yang baru...
pengalaman hidup mengajar aku lagi erti matang.
besarnya ujian tuhan dekat aku kan?
kadang-kala aku takut aku jer yang tak dapat menghadapinya.

sambil aku dengar2 muzik aku melatihkan diri untuk sentiasa sibuk dari dunia luar yang sedang perangkapkan waktu sisa hidupku.
masa?adakah kau sedang mencari hari untuk bisa menungguku?

hate

Today is a my bad luck..thanxx to rizmel nazrin dato malik cos u hurt my feeling..is it i should says congrats to u babe?after what u have done to me..u are such a denial person.u hurt me and then u give me a stupid reasons.
please go away from my life, u hypocrite and u lying..I hate u and i swear, I will kill u if u suddenly come to me.
In fact, I hope i never knew u Mel.
cos now for me, I don't know u,and i hope i lost memory about u..

TO RIZMEL,
THANXX FOR EVERYTHING AND I HATE U ALL OF MY LIFE!!

allergic

Pagi yang sama dan jam menunjukkan pukul 9 pagi. Masih duduk dimeja yang sama dan cuma hanya boleh berkata..selamat pagi Isnin. Aku cuma rindukan zaman aku dulu..time tuh no one care about me and no one fuck about my life..

sekarang memang lainlah,ada jer manusia hati jahat, muka mintak lempang,lelaki perasan bagus,manusia poyo, orang jahat yang datang kat aku...
shuuu shuu..go away from me okeh!! sebab korang menyusahkan aku..
tuhan aku nak hidup aku yang dulu.

kadang-kala aku aneh tengok manusia yang bertopengkan kejahatan,tapi berpura-pura sangat baik. aku pon bukan baik tapi aku tak sekejam kau yang suka memaksa..wahai manusia-manusia sekaliaan tolong jangan gangu hidup aku boleh?
sebab mulot kau manis tapi penuh penipuan.erkk..

I'm allergic with hypocrite people. Thank you.

Inside

I feel something different for the 1st time. I don't know what inside my heart, that I can't counted but I just can feel without asking. Uncontrollably my emotion.

Today someone already hurt my feeling, even though he asked for the forgiveness, but my heart truly cannot accept it. I make a mistake and you make a mistake too. We are human, in fact you are not what I expect. You became different, you just said about what you really want for me.But you never know what I feel. I swear I don't want to know about you again.You always said you really confident with your words-but I denial.

The secret conversation-You lying.

I question myself so much at times.

But now, you ignore me after you hurt my heart. Do you know my heart crying?

more than words-extreme

Saying I love you
Is not the words I want to hear from you
It's not that I want you
Not to say, but if you only knew
How easy it would be to show me how you feel
More than words is all you have to do to make it real
Then you wouldn't have to say that you love me
Cos I'd already know
What would you do if my heart was torn in two
More than words to show you feel
That your love for me is real
What would you say if I took those words away
Then you couldn't make things new
Just by saying I love you
More than words
Now I've tried to talk to you and make you understand
All you have to do is close your eyes
And just reach out your hands and touch me
Hold me close don't ever let me go
More than words is all I ever needed you to show
Then you wouldn't have to say that you love me
Cos I'd already know
What would you do if my heart was torn in two
More than words to show you feel
That your love for me is real
What would you say if I took those words away
Then you couldn't make things new
Just by saying I love you
More than words

ignorance

I'm just a soul whose intentions are good.

But sometimes people do not understand what I feel.

Until one day people hurt my feeling.

Ignorance is cruel.

It can be truth.

The feeling that you cannot touch but you just can feel that when it's gone.

The journey is ridden with uncertainties pacified emotions

and unanswered interrogations.

Until I wonder how I would always say that I'm okay.

But my heart always said "I'm lying".

perfume-seventh heaven

どれだけ　君のこと思い続けたら
やわらかい　言葉じゃなくて君に届く
もしもね　この願いがずっと叶うなら
弾けて　消えてもいいよ　ってどんだけ
SEVENTH HEAVEN

私のななめ上　優しく見下ろして
おでこをなでるの　ああ
その大きな手に　つかまっていたいよ
きっとそのまま宙へ　上ってくの　天国へ

どれだけ　君のこと思い続けたら
やわらかい　肌を感じて君に届く
もしもね　この願いがいつか叶うなら
とろけて　消えてもいいよ
SEVENTH HEAVEN

SEVENTH HEAVEN

ciku oh ciku

aku sangatlah frust, rasa nak marah tapi jangan marah sebab hari ni hari jumaat..
aku frustrated sebab buah ciku favorite aku tuh takder..
perlu ker aku jerit seperti anita sarawak macam lagu-AKHIRNYA KINI PASTI KU MERASAI~
tetibe jerkan.

tahu tak ciku itu adalah favorite tupai*teringat lagu orang kelate-ada sekor anak tupei.
huaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa..ciku cak cak..

aku seperti dah addicted dengan ciku, mesti aku akan beli ciku pagi-pagi dekat kedai..
ciku manakah kau?

dan aku hanya membuat lonjakan paradigma sebab aku hari ni frust.

maaf-aku berkabung diatas ketiadaan buah ciku =(

mengira ayat

dimulakan dengan bismillah disudahi dengan alhamdullilah.

Aku hari ni bangun lambat pergi kerja,biasalah aku dapat tidur pasti aku akan tidur mati.Semenjak papa dah start kerja balik ni,takder siapa nak kejutkan aku lagi bangun pagi..tuh pasal aku selalu terbabas.KL sekarang memang panas ker?aku pon tak paham dengan cuaca di Malaysia ni..mungkin sebab aku tidak pandai berbicara dengan kata-kata sang awan.

Dalam train, lagi 10 minit nak sampai office, client aku from Malaysian Herbal Science call aku nak suruh aku joint meeting dengan dia before dia meeting dengan Dr.Wan- COO Biotechcorp.

Time nak tunggu Lift kat office,al-kisah terserempaklah aku dengan client aku..aisehmen kantoi aku lambat datang office..ekekekek..dengan selamberjer client tuh kata, gila rock star kau ni farah dengan spec belbagai..

dress up hari ni-kemeja hitam,jeans hitam,high heel 4inci, specs, handbag Coach dan subang bulat besar. Tema hari ni * sempoi jer* takderhallah.
Just ignore what people said about me.hahahha..ayat berani mati aku kan?

dalam lift sebok bincang pasal Bionexus, dalam hati ada sedikit pelik.sejak bila pulak aku jadi account manager ni.Tapi aku appreciate client ni, sebab diorang suka cara aku berkerja dan hargai setiap kerja yang aku buat.Sampaikan pergi negeri isketambola pon ada belikan aku Ole2.*istanbul daa*. Client ni asyik cakap thank you kat aku. aku just jalankan tugas aku sebagai pekerja dengan ikhlas.
Mak ayah saya cakap kita kerja kene ikhlas-ayat skema telah pon aku keluarkan.

Yang gile terharu-client ni siap ajak aku lunch dengan dia lagi kat KLCC.Selamatlah photoshoot aku cancel hari ni, sebab photographer tu nak shoot gambar Siti Nurhaliza.
Aku ok jer, takderhallah aku.

Sambil-sambil tuh aku baca email, tak boleh blar si andrew pergi letak nama group Bowling-Group cuci longkang..bro mulot mu janganlah agak masin, aku berharap kita dapat kalahkan group lain. Sory aku terasa nak pegang trofi ada ukir nama aku bro..Bukan tamak, cuma nak menguasai Nexus Bowling Tournament next week.hahaha

dan satu lagi kenapakah?



Yang aku cuma pelik hari ni-Kenapa coffee aku manis sangat?

never

Just back from jogging, I am too tired today key in data for Seed Fund and update some of documents.

Suddenly, I thinking about Ajad again.Yes I admit,lately I always think about him. Why suddenly he came after what he already done to me, he always came in my mind. I lost my control to always think about Ajad.

Fate acts in strange ways.

I don't know if I can ever forgive him after what he already done to me.



I never expect why before this I really admirer him. Until one day, he leave me without said "Good Bye". He just leave and I just stay with a fake smile.
Do you know why I difficult to forget you? because before this you promise me you always with me and make me happy.

Love is blind indeed and god works in mysterious ways.

It's funny how when someone says they love you, you can't really feel it, but when they say they don't love you anymore, you can feel every ounce of what was drain out of your entire being.

At the end of the day, people need to learn from their mistakes. I know, he didn't knew what happened behind the truth.At this point, not my mistake and I have no power to judge him.

I am not only forced to grin and bear it, but also extend the same courtesy as I do to others who have graced my home. God works in mysterious ways.I can only pray for his happiness.

"Life is like a box of chocolates and you never know what you gonna get"...

I have faith in what will be, and until then, my path is thus.

- farah -

alive

"It's a wonder I'm even alive. Sometimes I think that. I think that I can't believe I haven't killed myself. But there's something in me that just keeps going on. I think it has something to do with tomorrow, that there is always one, and that everything can change when it comes".

charm oh adik manis

pagi lagi charm dah hantar message kat YM aku..biasalah morning message..
charm gila rindu kat kau.. HUGGGGGGG... untuk charm..ekekkeekek..
charm thanx sebab jadi kawan aku..ingat lagi 1st time aku kenal kau.kau datang dekat office aku untuk interview..baru kenal kau dah siap bagi ole-ole kan charm?
aku suka kawan dgn charm sebab dia selalu takderhallah..
serius dia sempoi tahap dewa 19..
weh charm aku rindu kau gile2..
nanti ada masa jom lepak dengan aku makan nasik public phone..
ker kau nak makan Popeye charm dekat Wangsa walk?
apa-apa pun terima kasih banyak2 kat tuhan sebab tuhan hadiahkan charm dekat aku..yuhuuu..charm kau memang go international..
sayanglah kau charm..huggg =p


p/s;motif disini sebab lama tak lepak dengan charm..

b-a-l-a-n-c-e

Just had my breakfast, and kinda busy with lots of paperwork.

I am worry with my life now cos I start busy until sometimes I have to skip my lunch time. Next week I have interview with Architecture Firm. Last night I got a call from Tressie Yap. She asked me to come for the interview, and she also make interview through phone. Thanks to God I pass the 1st interview, so next week is my 2nd interview.

This Friday, I have photo shoot with Utusan newspaper, and still thinking either I should go or not because I have no time to go. My lunch time for Friday from 12.30-14.30pm and I'm afraid if I cannot arrange that time during the period. Dear God, what should I do now? Is it I must go for this photo shoot?
I'm confused should I go or not.

There are so many new things in my life now and I worry that I will never find that balance.

So much of the unknown.

For the first time I'll be making those baby steps, just me, for myself, with the support of those closest to me, closest to my heart.
Now I realized, I am not go with a same routine. In fact, I already get up from my old life. Half of my life became different. I am starting a new journey and I am pursuing happiness.

Until then, my mind is open for the opportunities that will rise, but if I am to make the most of those opportunities.

May God bless us all on our individual journeys.

expression

I teach you how to create your expression.
I teach you how to smile.
I teach you how to fly without wings.
I teach you how to be yourself.
I teach you how to feel comfortable.
I teach you how to say I love you.
I teach you how to tackle a girl.
I teach you how to date with a girl.
I teach you how to happy.

and..until one day..

U teach me how to look into your eyes.
U teach me how to walking without expression.
U teach me how to laughing.
U teach me how to confident.
U teach me how to smell perfume.

and then u always said..u like my Bvlgari.
But you don't know I like the way you looking at me.

Can u feel what i feel now?
Can u be my perfume?

I still remember your smell.
I still remember the way you look at me.
I still remember when the 1st time you said you really need me in your life.
I still remember when the 1st time you hold my hand.
I still remember when the 1st time you introduce me with your family.
I still remember when the 1st time you became crazy because you worried about me.
I still remember when the 1st time you said "can u wait for me fara".
I still remember the 1st present i got from you.
I still remember my 1st dinner with you.
I still remember you give me a special feeling.

Until today even though you far from me, I still kept the expression. I promise myself to always remember all of this. Never forget but always appreciate the time between me and you.
Today is the day. I still remember when the 1st time I be your friend, you came to me and introduce yourself with a smiling face.

" Hi, I'm Tawfik".

energy-marina inoue english & japanese

もっともっと近くに感じてたいよ
君のその体温を

ひらひら風に舞う枯葉のせいで
いつもと違うこの坂
君と出会ったときには
ただ緑のトンネルが続いていた

いつも通い慣れた場所だったのに
今日は一人が寂しくなった
君がとなりにいないだけで
凍っていく世界に苦しくなるの

もっともっと近くに感じてたいよ
君のその強さまで　全部
すごく遠く離れた場所に居たって
繋がっているから

優しいその声も　私を満たすenergy

きらきら雨誘う夕暮れの街
傘を持たずに出てきた
びしょぬれの私を見て
君はイジワルに笑っていた

水たまりをわざと二人で踏んで
波紋を見つめ　約束したね
君の大好きな冬が来たら
二人の記憶に鍵をかけると

ねぇ
ずっとずっと傍で抱きしめてたいよ

*english*

I want to feel it even closer, closer
That warmth of yours

Because of the dry leaves fluttering in the wind
This hill seems different than usual
When I met you
It was a continuous tunnel of nothing but green

It's a place I got used to passing through
But today, all alone, I became lonely
Simply because you aren't by my side
The world freezes over, and it's painful

I want to feel it even closer, closer
That strength of yours, and everything
Even though we are in greatly separated places
We are connected

That gentle voice is the energy that fills me

Beckoned by the sparkling rain, I went out
Into the evening town, without an umbrella
Seeing me all drenched
You laughed unkindly

Together we stepped into the puddles on purpose
Watching the ripples, we made a promise
When the winter you love so much arrives
We will lock away the memories of us

Hey
I want to embrace you always, always
That weakness of yours, and everything
No matter how much you show that you've grown stronger
It will still show through

Beneath the same night sky, you were crying

Embrace me always, always
Wipe away this pain of mine
Even if you should forget me
I will always be waiting

I want to feel it even closer, closer
That warmth of yours, always
Even though we are in greatly separated places
We are connected

That gentle voice, that warm temperature
Everything of yours, is the energy that moves me

n-e-r-v-o-u-s

I got a call from Architecture firm just now, and i quite nervous because I have no experience regarding architecture. I just apply for this job and perhaps she call me for the interview. Yes, she call me but she call me at a wrong time. I have no preparation for this interview through phone. I admit I start to nervous. I hope I can get a better offer and better salary if I get this job.

I asked her to call me back after 3pm but until now no call for me. Oh God,please help me to make myself more confident for this interview. If I not mistaken, this is my 3rd interview. Insyallah everything will be okay. Just calm down and take a good step to be more efficient and effective person. I try to be flexible.

Perhaps, I can get more opportunity and changes after this.OMG what happen to me. I can't control myself to think negative..Farah please optimist and confident.
Orait I take this challenges for my experience. For me God doesn't give a problem that we can't solve. I trust myself that i can facing this problem.

Tawfik thank you for you advice, wish me luck Tawfik.
I believe that i can do it. Now, I start to smile with my life.
I remind myself again-farah don't kill your intelligence for next week. It just interview, just go and make more preparation and the most important show your knowledge,skills and abilities to them.

Wish me luck guys!!

Light Is SEXY coke!

Light Is SEXY coke with ZER0 sugar.



What a bad day i have today? It's happened because of i took overdose medicines until i sleepy and slept on my table. Because of too sleepy i went to buy soft drink and suddenly i saw one of lots of Coca-cola. Wow!! So sexy this Coke and I love the new version and design of Light Coke. Then, I decide to buy it. A new vision for Light Coke- Light is SEXY coke!!